Mark Me Down as Equal Parts Scared and Turned On
by OfficiallyNifty
Summary: When Hawke is implemented in a prank, Fenris discovers that Hawke has been keeping a secret from him. Will the secret serve to tear them apart or help them grow closer?


A/N: This one-shot came across because I headcanon that my OC Constance Hawke was born a mage but found a way to suppress her magic because she wanted to be a normal woman. This explores how she feels about her magic. This piece takes place After A Bitter Pill but before they've reconciled in act 3. Also this piece contains tasteful dominant Fenris and allusions to sex. If either of those squick you out, this is not the piece for you. Otherwise, enjoy lol

He had never thought Hawke capable of such an immature prank. Why would she do this to him? Was it...was it because she upset with him for leaving? No, Hawke was not petty like that. She was above such things he was sure of it and yet he could not help but wonder. Perhaps it is something she did while drunk but how and when did she sneak into his mansion? He needed to speak to Varric.

"Where is she?"

"Where's who, elf? You're going to have to be more specific. I know a lot of hers." Fenris barely resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"Hawke. Where is she?" Varric raised an eyebrow at Fenris's terseness.

"Do I look like Hawke's keeper?" Fenris did roll his eyes this time and took his leave. If Varric claimed not to know where Hawke was there was a good chance she was still at the estate. And that is how Fenris found himself heading to the Amell estate so early in the morning.

Fenris walked into the Amell estate, heedless of Bodhan's frantic cries behind him. If Hawke was behind this, he would get to the bottom of it. He stormed up the stairwell and slammed open the door to Hawke's bedchamber.

Constance startled with the sound of her door being heaved open. She had been changing into her house robe from her chemise but all thoughts of modesty were wiped from her mind as she spun around, ready to defend her home from attackers. Instead of a group of idiotic, biased Free Marchers she was face to face with Fenris.

"Fenris, what in the bloody void are you doing here?" She could tell that he was angry but she didn't know why. She hadn't done anything to him. Well she had but it had been some time since they...no, now was not the time to be having such thoughts. Bodhan chose that moment to rush in.

"Messere, I am so sorry! I tried to tell him you were dressing for the day but he would not stop!"

"It's alright, Bodhan. You can go back to your duties." Bodhan looked nervously between the two before taking his leave.

"Alright, why don't you try telling me what's the matter and instead of just glowering at me?"

Fenris took a breath, presumably to calm himself, before speaking. "Where is it?"

"Where is what exactly? Isabela's pants? Anders's sense of humor? Merrill's common sense? You're going to have to be more specific, Fenris." _Huh that's odd, why is he blushing?_

"Do not play innocent Hawke. You know why I'm here."

"No, I really don't. Care to enlighten me?" Constance said with a raised eyebrow. Fenris reached into a pouch on his belt and pulled out a piece of parchment and handed it to Constance.

 _Dear Fen-Fen,_

 _If you ever wish to see your beloved undergarments again (which by the way, look exquisite on you) meet me at my estate and I shall consider giving them back if you ask very nicely._

 _All my love,_

 _Constance_

"I didn't write this! This screams Isabela." Constance yelled embarrassed.

"Isabela stole them?"

"Isabela steals a lot of things, Fenris. That's what a pirate does." Fenris scoffed.

"I know what a pirate is. My apologies. It appears I was mistaken. They are not here then?" Constance blinked for a few seconds. That had not been what she had expected to hear. She really wanted to ask why in Andraste's name, Isabela would have Fenris's undergarments but she wisely decided not to ask. It wasn't her business and she wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer.

"I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news but no, I haven't the slightest clue where your undergarments are." Fenris turned to leave when he saw something out of place in the center of Constance's bed. He walked over and picked up his smalls, a flush enveloping his face. Whether it was from embarrassment or anger, Constance couldn't tell.

"Would you believe me if I said I have no idea what they're doing there?" Constance jokingly asked.

"Hawke." Hearing Fenris say her name like that grated on her nerves. It sounded so impersonal, like he was trying to pretend he didn't know her intimately. It wasn't that this was a big deal but it still hurt to be around him after he had walked away and she couldn't deal with this right now.

"Why did you assume I took them in the first place! That note was clearly from Isabela!"

"They were in **your** bed."

"Of course it's my fault. Why wouldn't it be my fault? After all, what does magic touch that it doesn't spoil? If it wasn't for my magic, I would be normal and deserving of life and love like the rest of Thedas!" Constance realized too late what is was she said. She had no warning before she was pinned to the wall. Fenris's irate eyes boring into her with one of his hands on her throat and the poised above her breast; ready to pull out her heart. Constance could scarcely remember the last time she had been this terrified for her life.

"Fenris..let...let go. Need..to..b-br-breathe."

"You lied to me! I thought you were different. But no, you're a monster like the just like Merrill and the Abomination!" Here she was slowly suffocating to death and she was getting turned on. Maybe...maybe Fenris was right. She was a monster, cursed with magic. She was doomed to bring pain and suffering to all those she loved. Fenris would be doing the world a service if he killed her.

"Look at me. Why?!" Constance raised her eyes up to his and saw behind the anger, pain. He thought she had betrayed his trust. She had only been trying to protect him. She had just wanted him to love her back.

"I hate magic, that's why!" Constance managed to force out. In his shock, Fenris dropped her. Constance fell to her knees. She didn't bother to stand up.

"What?" It was a hushed whisper but she heard it in the eerily stillness of the room.

"I said," Constance said a little more forcefully, "that I hate magic. All because of my bloody magic, I've had to live my life on the run. I haven't had many friends, I endanger anyone I come into contact with. I live my life in constant fear that the templars will find me and make me tranquil! I didn't asked to be cursed with my magic. I just want to be a normal woman, one who is worthy of love and a family. But I can never have that. Everyone I've ever loved has died...or left me." The implication was heavy between them. Constance was weeping now, she couldn't help it nor did she even care. "So if you're going to rid the world of another mage, hurry up and do it! But I never meant to hurt you. Just once, I wanted to be a normal woman." Constance stood up on wobbly legs and opened her robe. "Go ahead, rip out my heart! We both know you're dying to kill another evil mage! Go on! DO IT!" Constance's chest was heaving and she hadn't stopped crying. Fenris closed in and she readied herself to be with her family for eternity. At least her papa loved her. She did not expect to have a pair of soft lips pressed forcefully against hers. It took Constance a moment to realize that Fenris wasn't killing her, he was **kissing** her. He was kissing her like a drowning man. His kiss was equal parts desperation, anger, and passion. Constance found her hands being held above her head. Fenris's other hand was on the back of her head, trying to get her even closer. Constance had never felt so vulnerable or submissive before in her life. She was really screwed up for finding this as hot as she did. She gave into him without a second thought. It felt good to be wanted. Fenris finally pulled back from her mouth to allow them air. They panted heavily.

"You will never ask me that again, is that understood?" Constance could only blink dumbly at the change of events. Plus his kiss hadn't exactly left her brain very coherent. Fenris bit the flesh of her neck in retaliation. Constance bit down lip.

"Y-yeah…"

"Good." And with that Fenris was kissing her again just as forcefully. She didn't know what was going to happen after this but at the moment she didn't particularly care. All she knew was that she needed this and if Fenris was willing then who was she to look a gift horse in the mouth?

Constance awoke sometime later feeling sore. She sat up and walked over to her mirror. _Hmm, definitely not a dream then if those love bites are anything to go by._ Constance didn't know what their...encounter meant. She probably shouldn't assume it meant anything. It was probably just angry sex for him. Constance wanted to cry again. She hoped she hadn't royally screwed up one of the best friendships she had ever had. She would have to go and patch up the damage but that would be later, much later. Right now there was some whiskey with her name on it.


End file.
